Artist's Statement
I trust everyone had a pleasant summer. My hiatus was
an even greater success than I had hoped. I missed everything
about cartooning—the opportunity to spout off about politics
every week, your e-mails, the groupies—except drawing
cartoons. I did toss off the occasional cartoon about monsters
(Cthulhu, Dracula, Lieberman), but devoted most of my time to
writing for publications of varying prestige and quality about
hardcore horror writers, retired cartoonists, conservative humorists,
and Pluto. I return to weekly cartooning this week, refreshed
and warily prepared to turn my attention to terrestrial politics
once more.
I’m afraid it’s likely that you’ll
be seeing cartoons about politics less consistently, and more
cartoons about monsters. Many of you have written Ms. C.-H.
to let her know that you appreciate my political work, that
you depend on it for perspective and sanity, and to encourage
me not to give up my ceaseless battle against The Man. And I
am genuinely grateful for it. But please bear in mind that the
reasons you enjoy reading my cartoons (seeing your own marginalized
political views given vent, cathartic release of outrage, the
reassurance that It’s Not Just You) are not necessarily
the same reasons I enjoy drawing them (monsters, tits, explosions).
Also, as regular readers have perhaps begun to sense, having
to get infuriated about the latest affront to the Constitution,
common sense, or human decency every week—not to mention
having to find something funny about it—has been hard
on me. The process of turning the raw material of rage into
the refined product of humor is not unlike that whereby liver
metabolizes alcohol; it saves the body from poisoning, but,
ultimately, also turns the liver into a tough, shriveled, useless
little lump. This is what was beginning to happen to me. The
rage!—the rage was killing me.
This September finds me more productive, and in better
spirits, than I have been in several years. I intend to continue
to spend most of my time writing even as I return to weekly
cartooning. We do have an election coming up, and I’ll
be observing that with a jaundiced and pessimistic eye. But
already I confess I am indulging almost pornographically fun
fantasies that if the Democrats inadvertently manage, through
sheer virtue of the Republicans’ incompetence and evil,
to win control of the Legislative branch, they might finally
find the balls to launch investigations into this administration’s
unprecedented abuses of power and put the President, and his
owners and lackeys, in jail. One way or another, I am resolved
to continue drawing political cartoons at least intermittently
until George Bush has been evicted from the White House, which
hopefully will be sooner rather than later. It’s just
that once in a while I’m going to have to give it a rest
and turn instead to soothing thoughts of monsters and space
battles.
For a while there I really did turn off the radio every
time I heard the word Hezbollah, which, for most of August,
meant snapping it off almost immediately every single time I
tried to listen to the news. I feel like I missed nothing. After
a summer of hysterical alarms about a Third World War and Armageddon,
I’ve emerged from my media blackout and am shocked to
learn that the Middle East is an impoverished rubble-strewn
shithole teetering on the brink of a bloodbath, just as it has
been every day since I was born.
Readers of J.D. Salinger will not need to be told who
“The Fat Lady” is.
Of my ill-considered visit to the grave of H.P. Lovecraft,
and of my subsequent sojourn in that Godforsaken city of Providence,
whose cowering gambrels I hope never to glimpse again in this
life, it is best I should not speak, not only for the sake of
my own sanity and peace of mind, and of those black secrets
it is now my unwelcome duty—I should say my curse—to
keep locked within my brain until death, but for your own, gentle
reader: for if I were to impart to you the merest sliver of
an intimation of the Things I have seen and learned these last
months, you would spend the rest of your wretched days screaming
in a madhouse.
As I’ve mentioned, I really did become the Lorax
of Pluto for a couple of days in August. I wrote an op-ed for
the New York Times in a last-ditch effort to save Pluto’s
place in the solar system, and the next day, when Pluto finally
got the formal boot from the I.A.U., I inexplicably became the
go-to Pluto guy for ABC News, and ended up not only doing a
commentary for ABC World News online but being interviewed on
Nightline (which I persisted in referring to as Loveline in
front of the show’s crew). That brief glory has blown
over now, and Pluto and I have both been returned to our respective
peripheral and obscure places in the outer darkness, where we
brood on old wrongs, and coldly, implacably, scheme our revenge.
My Invisibility Goggles come to me courtesy of the
Superhero Supply Co. in Brooklyn, NY. Ladies, beware!